How Did We Get Here?

HDWGH – Story 71 – Pass The Salsa

Photo credit – My wife

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**:

The black SUV made its way through the incredibly long line at the local McDonald’s drive through. Danielle was in line 2 and both lines seemed to be progressing along at a snail’s pace. She looked over to her left as she started to round the corner towards the pay window and saw a small plastic container of Salsa stuck in a tree branch. Danielle began laughing as she tried to piece together the events that must have occurred to have the Salsa stuck in a tree.

**Before**:

Mavis Gomez was hungry. I guess you could call it “Hangry.” If starving wasn’t bad enough, she had been asked to park her car until her fish sandwich could be made. She didn’t understand what was so hard about not putting tartar sauce on it. Adding the sauce was an extra step. Her rage was beginning to flare up.

The reality was that her order only took an extra 5 minutes to prepare. Since she arrived at that “sweet” time between breakfast and lunch, she was able to get a fish sandwich for herself and grab a breakfast burrito for her husband Sal. He would nod his head which was his way of saying “thanks” but Mavis could only focus on the fact that she was starving…to…death. She glanced in her rear view mirror and caught the uniformed person running out to her car to deliver her order.

She grabbed the bag barely having time to say “Thank you” before tearing open the bag and grabbing her sandwich. This was the moment she had been waiting for. She peeled back the paper and took a big bite, right into tartar sauce! Her rage had kicked into high gear now. The uniformed person was long gone but it didn’t matter.

Mavis opened her driver side door and reached into her bag grabbing the first item that she could. She pulled the item from the bag and threw it with everything she had at the small picture of Ronald McDonald on the menu sign. She wasn’t very good at throwing so the Salsa container landed in the tree next to the sign. It would have to do. Her rage having been satisfied, she climbed back into her car and drove off.

HDWGH – Story 70 – Out Yonder

Artwork by Adobe Firefly.

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**:

Before Daniel Baker tried to open his eyes, he knew he was lying in straw. As he slowly opened his eyes, he could see that dusk had turned into night. He was late for supper. His mother would be pissed. Was that his skateboard in the nearby tree?

**Before**:

Sam Rollins was loving life. He finally got the carburetor working as expected and his souped up 1971 Chevrolet Custom 10 sounded better than ever. It still wasn’t pretty but all of the cardboard and other duct tape covering the passenger window would be fixed up in due time. Hardees wasn’t exactly paying him THAT well and who cared if he could see out of that side of the window anyway?

Daniel Baker had been told not to ride his skateboard on Euharlee Road. “There ain’t no speed limit out yonder, boy” She’d say to him. Of course, he didn’t listen. Why would he? The old hag never left the house so how would she know how fast people drove on Euharlee? He had been doing it for six months now and everyone had been kindly going around him.

The truck only had three gears and Sam had it in third gear while the speedometer dial hovered around 52 mph. A slight bump and was that a yelp? No matter. Sam watched the speedometer climb to 55 miles per hour. Mission accomplished. He couldn’t wait to show off his new exhaust system next time he rode down Euharlee.

Of course, that would have to wait for another month until he made enough money from Hardees. “First world problems,” he thought to himself as he laughed out loud.

HDWGH – Story 69 – The Surfing Saga of Santa Cruz Otter

**Now:**
Laughter echoed along the shores of Santa Cruz as beachgoers watched an adorable otter balancing on a surfboard, looking like a true wave-riding pro.

**Before:**
In the tranquil waters of Santa Cruz, a mischievous yet endearing otter named Olive had developed an unusual obsession with surfboards. Her adventure began one sunny morning when she curiously hopped onto a deserted surfboard left on the beach.

Olive’s tiny paws gripped the board as she rocked back and forth, mimicking the gentle rhythm of the waves. To everyone’s surprise, she managed to balance herself, much like a skilled surfer. Her antics drew the attention of a few early risers, and soon enough, her fame spread along the coastline.

The word about the “surfing otter” reached a local news outlet, and soon, Santa Cruz was buzzing with excitement. Beach enthusiasts and tourists alike flocked to the shores, hoping to catch a glimpse of the adorable otter in action.

Olive, reveling in the attention, took her newfound hobby to a whole new level. She began to “borrow” surfboards left unattended by beachgoers, turning the act of “highjacking” into her signature move. With her keen sense of balance and natural affinity for water, she rode the waves with remarkable finesse, earning her the title of “Santa Cruz’s Littlest Surfer.”

As videos of Olive’s antics went viral, surfboard manufacturers started designing miniature boards for otters, complete with colorful patterns and tiny fins. The trend caught on, and locals began to embrace the otter’s presence as a symbol of their unique beach culture.

Olive’s playful escapades brought joy to the community and turned Santa Cruz into a hotspot for otter enthusiasts and surf lovers alike. Businesses embraced the trend, creating otter-themed merchandise and even hosting “otter surfing” events to raise awareness about wildlife conservation.

In the end, what started as an adorable quirk turned into a heartwarming tale of a little otter that taught a whole town to embrace the unexpected. So, if you ever find your surfboard missing in Santa Cruz, don’t be surprised if you catch a glimpse of Olive, the surfing sensation with a penchant for adventure!

HDWGH – Story 68 – Cookie Crisis – Part 2

This is the second of two different types of stories. Both have the same writing prompt which is a story about how a cookie can cause chaos. Artwork by Adobe FireFly.

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

** Now**
Mara stared in disbelief at the giant screen in Times Square. The news ticker scrolled: “Wall Street Crashes. Dow Plummets. Cause Unknown.” People were running around in a frenzy, cars were honking, and sirens blared in the distance. She clutched the half-eaten chocolate chip cookie in her hand, her eyes widening as she realized the impossible chain of events she had unwittingly set into motion.

**Before**

Mara, a junior programmer at a cybersecurity firm, was having an awful day. Her code kept breaking, and her boss was breathing down her neck. All she needed was a break, so she headed to her favorite bakery.

Across the street, in a small nondescript office, an elite team of stock traders were executing high-frequency trades. Their algorithm, “Bullseye,” needed the internet connection to be flawless. Every millisecond counted.

As Mara walked into the bakery, she couldn’t resist the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. She bought one and decided to sit at the café corner to savor it.

Feeling whimsical, she took out her phone and connected to the bakery’s WiFi. She posted a photo of her cookie on Instagram with the hashtag #TheCookieThatSavedMyDay.

Little did she know, the bakery’s WiFi router was on its last leg. Her upload pushed it over the edge. It crashed.

This bakery, due to a quirk of geography and infrastructure, shared an internet junction with the building across the street—where “Bullseye” was executing trades. The momentary lapse in connection triggered a fail-safe, sending “Bullseye” into a sell-off mode to minimize risks.

Within seconds, other trading algorithms interpreted this as a sign of impending market doom and began selling off, too. The cascading effect was instantaneous. The Dow Jones plummeted, causing widespread panic.

Mara finished her cookie, oblivious to the traders across the street pulling their hair out and the news reporters scrambling for an explanation. As the world around her spiraled into chaos, she simply thought, “Well, at least the cookie was good.”

HDWGH – Story 67 – Cookie Crisis – Part 1

This is the first of two different types of stories. Both have the same writing prompt which is a story about how a cookie can cause chaos. Artwork by Adobe FireFly.

**Now:**
A sea of people filled the streets of New York City, horns blaring, sirens wailing, and chaos reigning supreme.

**Before:**
It all started innocently enough with a simple chocolate chip cookie. Emily, a cheerful baker, had just pulled a batch of mouthwatering cookies out of her oven. Little did she know that her sweet creation would set off a series of events that would turn the city upside down.

As Emily placed the tray of cookies on her windowsill to cool, a strong gust of wind swept through, sending the scent of warm cookies wafting through the air. A food critic, on a mission to find the next big culinary sensation, caught a whiff of the aroma. Intrigued, he followed his nose and ended up at Emily’s bakery.

After tasting one of Emily’s cookies, the critic was blown away. He immediately posted a rave review online, and the news spread like wildfire. Tourists from all over flocked to the bakery, forming lines that stretched around the block. The sudden influx of visitors overwhelmed the local transportation system, causing massive traffic jams.

As lines of hungry customers spilled out onto the sidewalks, street performers and vendors saw an opportunity to capitalize on the chaos. They began entertaining the crowds with impromptu performances, turning the streets into a stage.

With the increased foot traffic, local businesses saw an unexpected boost in sales. But the demand for supplies quickly outstripped the available resources. Delivery trucks piled up in the narrow streets, unable to make their deliveries, and confusion reigned as drivers honked their horns impatiently.

In the midst of it all, a film crew that had been shooting a movie nearby found themselves caught up in the whirlwind of events. They decided to incorporate the chaos into their movie, creating a blockbuster that became an unexpected hit.

And so, a single cookie set off a chain reaction that led to traffic jams, street performances, economic booms, and even a hit movie in the heart of the city that never sleeps. It just goes to show that sometimes, the smallest things can have the biggest impact!

HDWGH – Story 66 – The Oscillating Fireball Situation

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**: Some screeching metal sounds, a couple of panic screams, and a sudden lurch later, the fifteen passengers of the Oscillating Fireball roller coaster ride knew they had a “situation.” Tanner Jordan could have sworn he smelled pee as if things weren’t bad enough..

**Before**: It was a mostly sunny summer day at the Forest County Festival in Crandon, Wisconsin. Tanner Jordan and his friend Jack were pretty excited to try the newest roller coaster to grace their annual festival.
It was a bit of tradition that the teenaged boys had started a few summers back. Last year it was the Screaming Falcon and the year before that it was called the Louisville Lightning, although there really wasn’t anything fast or lightning about it. A local festival isn’t going to have the big caliber roller coasters like a theme park would have but they didn’t care. They loved roller coasters.
What Tanner didn’t particularly like was the fact that JJ had a tendency to pee himself on loops. The Louisville Lightning didn’t have a loop so that year he was spared, but this year…

Note: This story is based on actual events. Read up on it here.

HDWGH – Story 65 – The Squirt Artist

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**: In an office area with only 10 cubicles close together, the amazing amount of an as of yet unknown substance running down various cubicle walls and from the ceiling, walls, and beloved water cooler could not be missed. Thelma slowly raised her blonde hair covered head above her cubicle wall to peer around. While the sounds of whatever level of orgasm that was she kept quiet, the results of said orgasm could not be missed. By. Anyone. Paying. Attention. And. Alive.

**Before**: Thelma knew what squirting was. She also knew what it wasn’t. It wasn’t cum. It was pee. It was getting to the state of being out of control. So out of control that you can’t control yourself or your bladder. Thelma could never get there. Not with the tools she had available to her which at the moment, was just her Mark I fingers. At her girlfriend’s bachelorette party last evening, all of the talk seemed to be about squirting. Everyone seemed to be doing it but her. She couldn’t but she desperately wanted to.

On the way to work that morning, Thelma stopped by a local sex toy store and was pleased to find a device that the owner swore would do the trick. Thelma couldn’t wait to use it.

Ok. Thelma really couldn’t wait to use it. Sitting at her desk, she dropped her panties and inserted the SQUIRT GOD Version 2 device inside her. She pressed a few buttons on the remote and immediately had to cover her mouth. The feeling was intense and sudden. Her nipples got instantly hard. They usually never did that.
Waves of pleasure washed over Thelma. She could feel it down her toes. Something was building but she knew she could control it. This could be the biggest orgasm she ever had. Another adjustment to the remote and…
Thelma’s undercarriage let loose with a volley of squirting that might be worthy of a world record as she struggled to stay silent. She couldn’t control the pulses and she was squirting everywhere. It felt like an eternity before simply trickling down her thighs and over her painted toes. Her body was shaking. She waited until the pulsing stopped to peer above the cubicle wall to see if anyone saw anything.

HDWGH – Story 64 – Give Me Shelter

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**: Mrs. Roland lowered her head in both exhaustion and sadness. Her beautiful brand new home on the outskirts of a small town in rural Georgia known as Tannersville had gone up in flames just 2 hours ago. She was in shock and the pounding on the outside of the tornado shelter was beginning to break her out of it. The fire company needed to confirm that she was ok, after all.

**Before**: The Smith family always celebrated the big holidays. The 4th of July was no different. Brian Smith had his various assortment of fireworks ready to launch. The wind was picking up but he felt fairly certain that they would be quite safe.

HDWGH – Story 63 – Boom

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**: Jennifer Turco kneeled down to give her father a kiss on his forehead. Josh was doing the right thing after all. This type of job needed to be done. If not by him, then who? Jennifer replaced her protective eyewear before bringing the thermal imaging device up within her view. It still showed six heat signatures. The expected and anticipated number. Josh turned his gaze up to his youngest daughter looking for the signal he needed. A confirmation that all six siblings were currently at home. Jennifer looked down at him and nodded. Josh caught the gesture and quietly moved his thumb from the green ABORT button to press the light red COMMIT button. The trailer suddenly erupted into a massive fireball flinging bodies here and there and breaking every window and other pieces that could be broken.The sound of a bouncing metal propane tank off to their left. Five feet away from Jennifer, a smoking and burnt male torso landed on an old wooden pallet and bounced away from her. A faint scream filled the air from what seemed like a few blocks away. The small subdivision was awake now. She could barely notice the slight smile in her dad’s gaze, but it was there. It was all better now. Everything was going to be just fine.

**Before**: Jennifer knew that Doug Jones was a child molester. In fact, the whole neighborhood knew. The problem was proof. All she had was gut instincts. The way he looked at the girls as they made their way home from school passing his, what she would swear, had to be a meth lab trailer. It made the neighborhood look like it had been transplanted from Detroit. She would talk to her ex-military father and see what he thought about this “problem.” Perhaps daddy could kill two birds with one stone on this one?

HDWGH – Story 60 – Sensory Depravity

-*From The How Did We Get Here Series*-

**Now**: Russell Thomas opened the sensory deprivation hatch and upon smelling the vileness inside, kneeled over and puked up his lunch.

**Before**: Jason James (JJ To all of his friends) was having some weird hallucinations in the sensory deprivation tank. All he could do was chalk this up to the overall experience. He didn’t know if this was a normal thing or not. This was only his second trip to the tank and he didn’t remember hallucinating the first time around.
As the silence began to abate and JJ began to wake up, a few things were obvious to him. He had a fever. He had just taken a big huge dump in the sensory deprivation tank.
He would later find out that he had contracted norovirus and while in the tank contracted a fever of about 103F.

-*This story has based on an actual story found on the Reddit /legaladvice website via BuzzFeed.*-